Tom Brady filling out last will and testament after being named Madden cover boy

Just months after winning his fifth Super Bowl ring, it seems that the career and possibly life of New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady may be coming to an end.

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Last week, it was announced that Brady will be appearing on the cover of the latest edition of the EA Sports football video game Madden 18.  Landing the cover hasn’t exactly been a good omen for past players. Former Madden cover players that have been bitten by the curse include: Garrison Hearst (broken ankle), Eddie George (toe), Duante Culpepper (back), Marshall Faulk (ankle), Michael Vick (prison sentence), Donovan McNabb (hernia), Shaun Alexander (foot), Vince Young (general sucking), Brett Favre (joining the Jets), Troy Polomalu (knee), Peyton Hillis (strep throat…no really), Adrian Peterson (more of a curse for his child), and Richard Sherman (Tommy John surgery), and of course last season, Rob Gronkowski saw his season end early with a back injury.

Upon hearing the news Brady immediately contacted a lawyer, and began putting his affairs in order.

“It has been a fun ride.” stated Brady through tears.  “I have enjoyed not only my time in the NFL, but also my time on earth. Unfortunately, it seems that all good things must come to an end. I will be leaving all of my worldly goods to my children. I will leave my starting position on the Patriots with Jimmy G. I have to give a few bucks to my boys John Jastremski and James McNally. Those guys are true friends. Thank you to Robert Kraft, Bill Belichick, all of Patriot Nation…oh, and one more thing…SUCK IT, GOODELL!”

NFL officials review Ronda Rousey KO, declare Rousey winner

Upon further review it seems that Ronda Rousey may still be the undefeated UFC bantamweight champion.

The National Football League made some news this week when it decided to have one of their officiating crews review the Ronda Rousey versus Holly Holm fight from Saturday night.

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In the actual fight Rousey was knocked out by a kick to the neck from Holm early in the second round.

During a season in which they have been under fire for numerous errors, NFL Comissioner Roger Goodell requested that an NFL crew review the MMA fight and render their decision.

Following a 227 minute review of the four minute bout, the NFL referees stepped out from under the hood of the replay booth and promptly announced that despite being knocked down and beaten senseless, Rousey was the unquestioned winner.

“NFL rules state that because Holm’s toes did not actually connect on the knockout kick, Rousey is still considered a fighter and is ‘capable of warding off contact’ therefore we had no choice but to award her the victory.” stated NFL referee Pete Morelli.

The ruling will be reviewed by the NFL office but isn’t expected to lead to any type of discipline for the crew.

“Mistakes are a part of officiating.” said the league’s head of officiating, Dean Blandino. “And if you watch the NFL every week then you know that they they are a BIG part of it.”

The Daly Dose Sports Podcast NFL Preview- Episode 41!

The Daly Dose Sports Podcast brings you an NFL Preview and gives a brief outlook for each team and where they should finish in their division. Clint takes a brief look at winners and losers in the first week of college football and counts down the Top 5 greatest hitters in NFL history. Check out Episode 41!

Episode 41

Steelers Titans Football

NFL releases the Deflate Gate report in it’s entirety

**Below is a full transcript of the NFL interview with New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichick. Warning some of the language may be graphic in nature.**

Ted Wells: Tom Brady ordered the deflated footballs because that’s what you told him to do!

Robert Kraft: Object!

Judge Roger Goodell: Sustained!

Wells: And when it went bad, you cut those guys loose!

Kraft: Your honor!

Wells: You doctored the log book!…

Kraft: Da-n it, Ted!

Goodell: Consider yourself in contempt!

Wells: Bill Belichick, did you order the deflated footballs?

Goodell: You don’t have to answer that question!

Head coach Bill Belichick: I’ll answer the question!

[to Wells]

Belichick: You want answers?

Wells: I think I’m entitled to them.

Belichick: You want answers?

Wells: I want the truth!

Belichick: You can’t handle the truth!

[pauses]

Belichick: Son, we live in a world that has balls, and those balls have to be guarded by men with needles. Who’s gonna do it? You? You, Coach Pagano? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for the Ravens, and you curse the Patriots. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That the Colt’s loss, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don’t want the truth because deep down in places you don’t talk about at parties, you want me on that ball, you need me on that ball. We use words like deflation, spying, atmospheric conditions. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a needle, and stand a post. Either way, I don’t give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

Wells: Did you order the balls be deflated?

Belichick: I did the job I…

Wells: Did you order the balls be deflated?

Belichick: You’re god–mn right I did!

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell promises punishment for Patriots in the form of a firm but gentle hug

With the findings of the Wells report in, the NFL has discovered that the Super Bowl winning New England Patriots deliberately deflated footballs. The footballs were used during the AFC Championship Game in January and Patriots quarterback Tom Brady was “generally aware” of the violations.

NFL Commissioner wasted no time in announcing a punishment that he deemed both “severe but fair”.

Brady, head coach Bill Bellichick, and team owner Robert Kraft will be the recipient of a “firm but gentle hug” from Goodell.

“Look they are the Super Bowl Champions but no one is above the law and I want to make it clear that we do not coddle rule breakers.” Goodell stated noting that the violators would have to travel to his office in NFL office in New York. Unless they “asked nicely”.

Would there be any words spoken during the hug?

“There might be a ‘there there, it’s okay’ uttered but believe me, it will be said with sternness and sincerity.” Goodell answered.