Tom Brady filling out last will and testament after being named Madden cover boy

Just months after winning his fifth Super Bowl ring, it seems that the career and possibly life of New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady may be coming to an end.

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Last week, it was announced that Brady will be appearing on the cover of the latest edition of the EA Sports football video game Madden 18.  Landing the cover hasn’t exactly been a good omen for past players. Former Madden cover players that have been bitten by the curse include: Garrison Hearst (broken ankle), Eddie George (toe), Duante Culpepper (back), Marshall Faulk (ankle), Michael Vick (prison sentence), Donovan McNabb (hernia), Shaun Alexander (foot), Vince Young (general sucking), Brett Favre (joining the Jets), Troy Polomalu (knee), Peyton Hillis (strep throat…no really), Adrian Peterson (more of a curse for his child), and Richard Sherman (Tommy John surgery), and of course last season, Rob Gronkowski saw his season end early with a back injury.

Upon hearing the news Brady immediately contacted a lawyer, and began putting his affairs in order.

“It has been a fun ride.” stated Brady through tears.  “I have enjoyed not only my time in the NFL, but also my time on earth. Unfortunately, it seems that all good things must come to an end. I will be leaving all of my worldly goods to my children. I will leave my starting position on the Patriots with Jimmy G. I have to give a few bucks to my boys John Jastremski and James McNally. Those guys are true friends. Thank you to Robert Kraft, Bill Belichick, all of Patriot Nation…oh, and one more thing…SUCK IT, GOODELL!”

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Gronk gets Madden cover, future cover of Microfracture Monthly

Last week, it was announced that New England Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski would be on the cover of the popular video game Madden NFL ’17.

And with the history of the infamous Madden curse, and the struggles to stay healthy by Gronkowski, it was also announced that he will be a future cover boy on popular medical journal Microfracture Monthly.

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Dr. Harry Lammond, a Colorado orthopedic surgeon, spoke about the decision to tab the tight end as a future frontman for his periodical.

“Look, we aren’t wishing injury on anyone, but let’s face it. Gronk does have a history of getting himself hurt. And now you add the Madden Curse into the mix? I mean come on, that is just tempting fate.”

The All-Pro tight end is no stranger to the injury report, in his six year career he has missed 16 games due to various ailments.

Former Madden cover players that have been bitten by the curse include: Garrison Hearst (broken ankle), Eddie George (toe), Duante Culpepper (back), Marshall Faulk (ankle), Michael Vick (prison sentence), Donovan McNabb (hernia), Shaun Alexander (foot), Vince Young (general sucking), Brett Favre (joining the Jets), Troy Polomalu (knee), Peyton Hillis (strep throat…no really), Adrian Peterson (more of a curse for his child), and Richard Sherman (Tommy John surgery).

But for all of the talk about the curse, Gronkowski seemed unfazed.

“I don’t even care, bro!” he shouted upon hearing the news. “We’re going streaking through the quad!”