Derrick Rose’s knee announces retirement from basketball

After just five seasons in the NBA Derrick Rose’s right knee has announced his retirement from basketball. “I have been playing basketball now for nearly 22 years and I feel like it’s time that I start spending some time with my family. The game of basketball has been very good to me and I have nothing but respect for the game and Chicago Bulls fans but I have to do what is best for me. I want to be able to walk with my kids at graduation. I want to walk down the aisle at their weddings”

The announcement comes as a surprise to most fans as it is on the heels of Chicago Bulls management announcing that Rose would return from meniscus surgery in four to six weeks.

“Yes I heard the announcement from the Bulls” Rose’s right knee stated “but that’s not me. I have to do what’s best for me. Besides I talked to ‘lefty’ the other day and he’s thinking about it too.”

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